Somewhere Between Eco-Guilt and Redemption

--Feature: "Sustainable Soul w/Rebecca Hecking"--

Bless me Al Gore, for I have sinned. I confess that I have not yet installed solar panels on my roof, though I have coveted them. I confess that I will drive with my family on vacation this year, though I have purchased offsets. I have even eaten of the forbidden fruit-of-many-miles, shipped from afar. I have sipped my coffee from Styrofoam cups. I am guilty. No matter how many “Hail Gaias” I say, I find myself in a state of eco-guilt.

Part of the trouble is that my contemporary lifestyle (and yours too) is not structured to make eco-friendly living particularly easy or convenient. More often than not, the eco-choice involves more time, money and/or effort. Sometimes, when I’m feeling overworked or stressed, I just give in and take the easy way. Sometimes I’m just plain selfish. I want that useless unsustainable piece of junk, earth be damned.

A bigger issue is that all of us are embedded within larger systems over which we have no control. Governments, corporate policies, choices made by CEOs halfway around the world… We all live with the consequences of others’ decisions every day. I have electricity from coal (green energy is no longer available from companies in our area) and neighbors who drive Hummers. Sigh…

On the other hand, there are days when I haul a load to the recycling center, dine on a meal of fresh-local-organic food, and make the time to hang out a load of laundry to dry in the sunshine. I like those days. I get to feel very self-satisfied. I even indulge in a little denial of those larger systems I just mentioned. Nice and smug in my state of eco-redemption.

The trouble is, the smug denial doesn’t last for long. The weight of Earth’s problems presses down, and I find myself feeling crushed by the sheer magnitude of it all. I am going to take a wild guess here, and speculate that I am not alone in my experience. There are no easy answers. No 12-step plans for recovering members of industrial civilization. No shining path to a restored earth with lots of stuff for everybody.

We are all in this mess together. Regardless of race, class, gender, religion, nationality, income, sexual orientation, ethnicity, political persuasion, state of health, age, education level, favorite color, preferred pizza topping or genetic heritage, in the end we are all simply human animals. Self-aware naked apes. The only surviving members of the genus Homo. The product of a 13 billion year journey from Mystery to energy, particle to atom, molecule, star and planet; from semi-living virus to herons, redwoods and humpbacks. Carl Sagan famously said that we are stardust. Literally. And it’s true. We really are stardust with consciousness. Quarks with personality. We are of the same substance as the rest of Gaia’s children. We are one.

It is here that all eco-guilt and redemption falls away, and we find ourselves in a State of Grace. It’s a liminal place, somewhere beyond and above policy debates and scientific predictions, where we perceive the essence of All That Is. We recognize it and embrace it. It sustains us. We touch Mystery, and it is enough.

Like all liminal places, we cannot stay forever. It’s back to 21st century “civilization” for us. Back to wrestling with the nitty-gritty choices and everyday challenges of living consciously and mindfully. Al Gore is right there beside me. And so are you. No guilt. No redemption. Just fellow humans, stardust siblings making our way together.

Rebecca Hecking writes on eco-spirituality, “green” living and sustainable culture from her home in Pennsylvania. Today is her 42nd birthday. She is a member of the species Homo Sapiens Sapiens, and is made up mostly of carbon, hydrogen, nitrogen, and oxygen. Just like you.

Evading Highway Hypnosis:Environmental Audio Journies Along "Invisible 5"

--Feature: "Inside the Green Museum w/Moe Beitiks"--

Highway hypnosis. Ever started out on a drive and woke up at your destination? There's the interstate system for ya: drive for miles and see nothing but road, hills and rest stops (plus maybe the occasional sign that says "EAT NOW."). There's that big stinky feedlot you pass sometimes. The one with miles and miles of cows wading in their own filth. That one warned you it was coming a couple of miles off. You can smell the stink of industrial meat production.

Some affronts to the environment, however, are much less apparent. It's these places and issues, seen and unseen, that artists Amy Balkin, Tim Halbur and Kim Stringfellow examine together with the organizations Greenaction, and Pond, in Invisible 5. The piece is a downloadable audio file that you can listen to while driving down (or up) California's highway 5, an artery that connects San Francisco and Los Angeles. The "audio tours" include interviews from local residents, nonprofits, professionals and academics who combat issues of pollution and health all along the otherwise scenic interstate. Here you thought tule fog was just a beautiful driving hazard-- turns out it holds higher concentrations of pesticide pollution and chemicals, such as ammonia, than surrounding air.

Not your average giant-dinosaur highway tour by far. But Invisible 5 manages to stay informative, not alarmist, and very effective at preventing highway hypnosis.

"Inside the Green Museum" is written by Moe Beitiks who is the Blog Editor for greenmuseum.org. She is also a writer, gardener, artist and biofuel lackey living in Oakland, California.

Eco-Chic Wall Tiles: Earth Friendly Details for the Well Designed Home

--Feature: "Conscious Chic w/Laura Dichtl"--

Inhabits Embossed Wall Flats are going to give you lots of inspiration for that hum-drum wall that you didn’t know what to do with.

These tiled wall coverings are designed to expand in any direction. They are applied with peel-and-stick adhesive tape and have an automatic pattern repeat. They are simple, modern, versatile and "goof-proof." You can cover an existing wall, help disguise a not-so-smooth wall or add a modern pattern to any room setting.

Customize them by rotating every other tile or row, mix-and-match patterns or paint them to coordinate with your decor. The rule is there are no rules and the important thing is to have fun with it. It's low stress, low commitment and a big payoff in the way these tiles will impact a space. They come in an off white unfinished look on recycled paper so give it a fresh clean bright white finish or pump up the color and you are well on your way to achieving a space that all will envy.

Since they are considered semi-permanent “Wall Flats” are removable, but may require some patience to make sure you don’t ruin your drywall, which is the case anyway with most wall hanging paper and can be reused which is a plus. Finally you can achieve that architectural and textured look that your plain walls were screaming for and you won’t believe that you did it yourself.

They come with an off white unfinished look which is on recycled paper,but you can pick the paint of your choice to create exactly the look you want and let it have as much impact on the space as you would like.

Materials used: Molded Bamboo Paper Pulp with Peel & Stick adhesive tape and comes in panels of 10 per box (18” x 18”) and cover 22.5 sq.ft.

Check out their entire line of Eco-friendly products along with their line of stretched wall art made with 100% sustainable recycled polyester. Hand printed and handmade in the U.S.A. with environmentally-friendly inks with no chemical waste or disposal generated.

For more information, log on to their website: www.inhabitliving.com



Conscious Chic is written by contributing writer Laura Dichtl, President of La Peruse Interiors. Laura is a respected interior designer with over fifteen years experience working with high end residential and business clients in the East End (Hamptons), North Shore Long Island and New York City.

Laura's inspired environments have earned her a reputation as a design and life-style expert. Her work has been featured in numerous magazines including Hamptons and HOME Magazine's. Conscious Chic by Laura Dichtl covers the best in "style" for the conscious consumers.

The Courage to Rethink Everything...as a Starting Point in Sustainability

--Feature: "Sustainable Soul w/Rebecca Hecking"--

May is in full bloom where I live in northwest Pennsylvania. The long, cold winter feels like a distant memory. The roadsides are looking (mostly) litter-free from the annual Earth Day cleanup frenzy. This year, some local third-graders made signs with slogans like “Do Your Part to Help Earth! Recycle! ” or “Don’t Litter! Save the Earth!”. These are posted strategically at intersections throughout town. Their efforts are sweet and I won’t argue with teaching third graders not to litter, but I can’t help feeling a sense of the surreal when I see them posted nearby the local big box store or just yards away from a formerly wooded lot recently cleared to make way for yet another retail outlet. Somehow I sense that the effort needed to “save the earth” might be just a little more intense and lifestyle-changing.

May is also the time around here when the planting season begins in earnest. It won’t be long before Amish farmers will hitch up their horses and plow the fields. Kids will present their mothers with pots full of newly sprouted marigold seedlings for Mother’s Day. Seeds are magical things: tiny little treasure chests of DNA, full of potential. It is nothing short of astonishing to compare a seed with the resultant fully mature plant. When seeds are planted, their task is to soak up water, swell, then burst through the seed coat sending roots down and delicate green shoots up, growing like mad. Most of the time this process works without a hitch, but sometimes the seed gets too much water and rots without ever breaking through the seed coat.

Sprouting is a supreme act of courage. Breaking free of limitations. Risking radical transformation. Stretching toward the unknown. Sometimes it feels easier to just stay inside one’s seed coat.

It seems appropriate that those third graders should post “Save the Earth!” signs right around the time when seeds are planted and nature is waking up and showing us by example the process of profound, transformative change. It is as though every tree, every seed, every flower and blade of grass are all screaming in unison, “WAKE UP! CHANGE! GROW! DON’T JUST SIT THERE AND ROT!!!” Do we hear them?

The deep, systemic changes needed to accomplish our given task of “Save the Earth!!” involve every aspect of our taken-for-granted thought processes. Can we start valuing intact ecosystems, instead of counting worth only by quarterly profit statements? Can we recognize the creative power of a sprouting seed and value it more highly than the destructive power of a nuclear weapon? Can we open our eyes to the fact that in the end, we who live richly in the developed world are not inherently more worthy of life and happiness than the most destitute and desperate who struggle at the edge of survival? Can we abandon the unfathomable arrogance that declares the American lifestyle as “non-negotiable” even in the face of global ecological collapse?

These are huge questions, and may seem a little “heavy” in an article that mentions third graders and Amish farmers. But that’s precisely the point. We no longer have the luxury of looking at a seedling without being struck to our heart’s core with its profound courageous beauty. We must find within ourselves the love and courage to re-think everything. Look at a child. Look at a tree. Open your heart. Question everything. Don’t just sit inside your seed coat and rot.

Rebecca Hecking is an Eco-spiritual writer with a BS in chemistry and an MA in cultural/equity studies. She plans to spend her summer evenings in a white wicker rocking chair on her front porch where she will sip lemonade and ponder the possibilities of a “Sustainable Soul” book proposal.

In Defense of the Sun: A Look at Benefits for Body and Soul

--Feature: "Heart of Healing w/Dr.Christopher Fischer, ND"--

As a Naturopathic Doctor I have a strong well taught belief that there is an innate healing power in nature. So, it is difficult for me to accept all the constant warnings about sun exposure as gospel. What I do know after living four years in Seattle, WA that when that sun peaked out from behind those clouds in late July-August, I couldn’t help but feel invigorated and better than I had felt in months.

Several research studies have shown various health benefits from sunlight(UV) exposure:

• Increases in Serotonin and decreases in Melatonin resulting in increased mood.

• The Increases in the active form of Vitamin D which not only helps protect bone density but is being studied for its anti-cancer benefits.

• Increased Absorption of Calcium by the intestines

• Decreases blood sugar levels in diabetics.

• Increased metabolism by increasing thyroid activity.

• Decreases the pain and inflammation from arthritis.

• Lowering Blood Pressure and improving heart efficiency.

• Lowering of cholesterol.

Now with all that said I am not advocating sunbathing, tanning machines, or forgetting your sun block. What I am proposing is that as I had believed to be true, limited exposure (10-15min), before or after peak sun hours (10am-4pm) can have its benefits for some people. Like any other disease, those with a personal or family history of skin cancer should be more very diligent at protecting themselves as there is evidence of genetic factors which predispose to skin cancer.

With our depleting ozone layer, and escalating environmental pollutants there may not be much time left to enjoy the health benefits of the sun both physical and emotional.

Do not be one of the statistics who ignore the power of the sun, overexpose and place yourself at risk. Use an UVA and UVB blocking moisturizer daily to protect yourself against peak hour exposure. Above all be responsible, as with most things too much of a good thing…….(you know the rest).


Christopher Fischer is a Naturopathic Physician and is the President of Natural Health Specialist in East Northport New York. He received his Doctorate in Naturopathic Medicine from Bastyr University.

He frequently lectures on Naturopathic Medicine and natural healing, and has been a contributing expert for American Spa Magazine, Creations Magazine, The Northport Observer as well as the Natural Health Show on METRO TV (NY). He is the proud father of two boys and resides in East Northport New York.

For more information see Christopher Fischer's site at www.webndny.com

Beyond Lead - Finding Out What's In Your Kids Toys

--Feature: "Greener One w/Molly Hovorka"--

I am the Co-Founder of Greenerone.com, an Eco-ratings community helping consumers make sustainable purchasing decisions. Working on Eco-ratings can be both a blessing and a curse. On the blessing side, I have an arsenal of resources for evaluating products, I stay informed about environmental trends and issues and I am in a position to help people make safer and more environmentally friendly decisions about the things they bring into their homes. On the curse side, I unintentionally bring small talk to a standstill at even the most casual of gatherings.

A few weeks ago, a brunch conversation with some friends and family turned to the issue of lead in toys. To be sure, this is a serious problem: one organization recently found lead in 35% of children’s toys that they tested, and in 38% of jewelry. The glorious sunny afternoon seemed to grow slightly darker when I piped up that the U.S. government restricts the use of lead in toys only in paint, and that it turns up in all kinds of places including jewelry, shoes, bibs, backpacks, and vinyl toys. And not only that, a whole slew of other toxins are founds in toys as well, including:

• PVC, which is a hard plastic that contains vinyl chloride, a carcinogen, and which also produces dioxin, one of the most toxic substances known, as a by-product. In addition, products made with PVC often contain phthalates to make them more flexible. Phthalates are linked to hormonal and reproductive problems, breast cancer, asthma and problems with the kidneys, liver and blood. PVC is used in books, bibs, backpacks, packaging, toys, plastic clothes and shoes and in other plastic products and components. Phthalates are also found in a wide variety of products besides plastic toys, including tablecloths, inflatable pools, detergents and personal care products.

• Cadmium, which is used as a stabilizer in PVC and paints, is linked to low birth weight, developmental disorders, and other problems, and is also a carcinogen. It can be found in painted toys and in backpacks, lunchboxes and bibs.

• Arsenic is a heavy metal that may make its way into children’s products via textiles or dyes. It is a known carcinogen that may also cause problems in the skin, blood, cardiovascular system and hormones.

• Mercury is used in inks, adhesives and in the formation of polyurethanes, and is dangerous to the nervous system and kidneys. While the more dangerous form of mercury (methylmercury) is not likely to be found in toys, there is a danger to workers manufacturing toys containing mercury as well as a hazard to the environment when the product is discarded. Mercury can be found in vinyl backpacks and bath toys.

HealthyToys.org is a good place to look up products by name, brand or type to find out the concentrations of any toxins that are present. While the site stops short of saying how risky a product is, it does provide detailed information about what levels of these ingredients are considered safe (and which organizations set these guidelines), allowing you to draw your own conclusions. To find out whether a product is safe while shopping, you can send a text message to MomsRising, which uses the HealtyToys.org database to provide you with an instant answer.



Molly Hovorka is a co-founder and the marketing director of Greener One, an eco-ratings community that gives you the tools and information you need to make greener choices. In addition, Molly writes the Greener One blog on greenerone.com, as well as the Greener One column on The Lohasian - both providing product reviews from a green perspective as well as environmental news and commentary. To compare products or to share your product knowledge with other conscious consumers, visit GreenerOne.com.


(Note: This post was originally published on greenerone.com)

Challenging Yourself to Generate Less Trash

--Feature: "Green Like Me w/Robin Shreeves"--

One summer my college roommate Allison worked for a waste management company. I had never heard the phrase waste management before. For some reason it struck me as funny. Other than that, though, I didn’t give the process of managing waste much thought back then. Fast forward a few (okay, more than just a few) years, and managing waste has somehow become a part of my daily life.

Allison recently told me that when she was in Germany last spring, she was impressed by how they handle their trash. She said that they recycle so much of their waste that they have huge recycling cans and very small trashcans outside of their homes. She saw this as a challenge and I felt compelled to rise to the challenge, too.

Managing the amount of trash at my house certainly is a challenge. But it’s worth the effort because the amount of trash that goes into the garbage cans and ultimately into the landfill is much less than it was a year ago. Hopefully, a year from now, it will be even less. Here are some tips for reducing the amount of trash that you generate.

• Use cloth napkins and rags instead of paper napkins and paper towels. Buy enough white cloth napkins to last your family for a couple of days. Wash them whenever you wash whites or towels. Don’t worry about keeping them pristine white or ironing them. Hide the paper towel roll under the sink and use old towels as rags.

• Limit the number of plastic and paper bags that you take from stores. If you don’t take them from stores, they can’t end up in your trash. Use reusable bags for all your shopping.

• Reuse disposable food containers as often as possible until they fall apart. Give away batches of homemade soup in them, use them instead of zipper bags in your kids’ lunch boxes, and save them to send home leftovers at holiday dinners.

• Think before you throw something away. Determine if there is another use for an item before chucking it. The twist ties that come on your bread bag can be reused to seal up an open bag of frozen vegetables. Use the empty bread bag when you clean out the cat’s litter box or walk the dog.

• Find new homes for still useful items. Never throw useful things in the trash. Donate. Give to friends. Sell online. Have a yard sale. Freecycle.

• Recycle anything and everything that can be recycled. Most of us are pretty good at recycling paper, bottles, and cans. But batteries, Styrofoam egg cartons, old sneakers, electronics, old cans of paint, and lots of other things can be recycled – you just need to find the places closest to you to drop them off. One of my goals for this year is to find those places closest to me so I can recycle more materials.

I know I’m not the only one who is thinking about trash in this way. According to government statistics, in 2005, Americans actually generated less trash than they did the year before. That’s the first time that has ever happened since records have been kept. That same year almost 1/3 of all trash was recycled. I’m trying to figure out how I can help improve those statistics. Wanna join me?


Robin Shreeves is a New Jersey based freelance writer who has been published in print and extensively online. Her column "Green Like Me" on The Lohasian helps readers new to the Eco-friendly lifestyle by providing simple and easy tips and tricks to "greening" their lives.

The Healthy Side of Sick: Embracing Germs for the Health of It

--Feature" Life w/Fyfe: Confessions of a Holistic Mom"--

I may be behind the times here, but I just became aware that Band-Aid makes a bandage with an antibiotic ointment placed on the pad. While this may seem like an incredibly convenient solution for some mothers, I am dismayed at this decision, one made likely in response to the MRSA (methicillin-resistant Staphylococcus aureus) infection that have become very common in recent months.

As a mother, I am extremely sympathetic to the tragedies in which children died of complications of MRSA, and I am horrified at the thought of any child succumbing to such a virulent infection. However, I don't think that continued overuse of antibiotics will help the situation. 15 years ago when I lived in Denmark I had a conversation with my general practitioner, who was refusing my request for antibiotics for a sinus infection. "Americans are overusing antibiotics with grave consequences for the entire world," he told me in a very serious voice. And while I resented his refusal to give me the help I requested, his words stuck with me, and actually started me on my journey toward holistic health.

It can be argued that we've become obsessed with germs evidenced by the vast array of antibacterial soaps and hand sanitizers. When I'm concerned about catching some bug from a sneezing neighbor, I remind myself that getting sick occasionally is a natural part of being healthy, and that allowing our bodies to experience the natural cycles of sickness and recovery only strengthens the immune system. Have we made our bodies less resistant to infection by continually coming to the rescue with antibiotics? I have my opinion, but I don't know for sure. But I do know that we've made bad bacteria stronger by forcing them to adapt to stronger and stronger antibiotics.

I was at a recent social event at my church when my daughter cut her finger. Someone made sure to bring a bandage right away and mentioned that it is necessary to keep out any dangerous bacteria. I wondered if it were possible to keep out any bacteria with a simple bandage. I wasn't worried about a MRSA infection, but clearly my well-intentioned friend was.

I considered the "barrier" approach to infection, in which one believes that bacteria must be eliminated at every possible entry point, and the "terrain" approach to infection, in which one believes that one limits risks to infection by strengthening the body. So far, the latter has worked for us, and while I can't prove it works, I do know that it feels better psychologically to live with this belief. Rather than fearing the unseen, I accept that I have good and bad bacteria around and in me at all times, and it's part of my job to eat foods that keep the bacteria in balance. Accepting the good and making peace with the bad -- it's a philosophy that makes sense on a lot of levels.


Lisa Fyfe is a contributing columnist for The Lohasian. Her column, “Life with Fyfe: Confessions of a Holistic Mom” delivers a perspective on the everyday life of a modern holistic mom, as well as provides an insider look into best strategies for natural health and healing for the whole family.

Lisa is a Reiki Master, and an expert in Essential Oil Healing, and has spent the last several years extensively researching traditional diet and nutrition, with a focus on “whole,” locally grown and raised natural foods. She is a married mother of two children, Sophie and Max. Lisa approaches mothering as her highest calling, and believes that all mothers are natural healers and enjoys helping mothers (and others) help their children through the use of a variety of natural modalities.

To Reach Lisa, Email Here at lisafyfe (at) verizon.net

The Spiritual Lessons of the Environmental Crises

--Feature: "The Conscious Life w/Dr. Jennifer Howard"--

In the area where I live, we had a Living Green Expo this past weekend, and it caused me to wonder about some things in a fresh way. There were many interesting and entertaining exhibits in the booths that lined the pathways, along with a lineup of speakers, of which I was one. Among the exhibits could be found book sellers, alternative health care methods and products, eco-friendly constructions products, healthy cooking and an assortment of wholistic magazines and news papers.

What does it really mean to live a green lifestyle? Some folks think in terms of solar rooftop panels, composting, recycling and other important concrete applications. Since my predilection is to think in terms of psychology and spirituality, I found my wonderings going in another direction. What does living a green lifestyle look like from a larger frame of reference?

We could say that living a green lifestyle is a commitment to living a life with more awareness of how we are affecting the planet we live on. Why do we bother? One impetus is having the foresight to notice that the choices we make now are part of our personal survival, as well as human survival and survival of the earth. Understanding this allows us to see that everything and everyone is connected. From the most practical earth-bound reasoning, this has been proven to be true. Not only are we affected by the actions of people in our communities, but how the pollution from one area of the world brings about changes in another part of the world. Something happens in one part of the world, which compromises life and nature great distances away. Therefore, we learn that every action we take does affect the earth and other people as well. That is humbling and at the same time empowering. We can’t just hide any more. It is time to wake up and take our rightful place on the planet.

Not only are we connected in the most physical sense, but we are connected in many other ways. Studies in the fields of psychology, spirituality and quantum physics all tell us that from the most concrete of levels of living to the most profound levels of consciousness, we are connected. If we think about this for a moment, we can see that our thoughts, feelings and actions have power and consequences. The choices we make in life influence how our life goes and influences the lives of other’s.

Let’s think for a moment. What would it be like if we made choices that reflected the concept that everything is connected? What might be different in our lives if we really knew that what we thought, felt and did affected others? We might be different. What would it look like if we knew that we are empowered to live a richer, fuller, more compassionate life? Compassion toward ourselves not only makes us kinder to others but also kinder to the planet.

Many of us don’t realize we can make these choices. We tend to give in and give up too quickly. We don’t take good enough care of our bodies, minds or spirits. We might think that we don’t matter, so nothing about us matters. We think we can’t make a difference with what we say or do. Most of us live our lives without being conscious of the full spectrum of possibilities in these choices. We forget, don’t take the time or don’t realize that we have what it takes to create a life that brings others, the planet and ourselves into more harmony. We do have what it takes. Let’s celebrate that!

This week allow yourself to ponder this question: What are the choices you could make, large or small, which would reflect the concept that everything is connected? Notice those choices and see if you can put a few into action.


Jennifer Howard, Ph.D. is an internationally known psychotherapist, Integrated Kabbalistic Healer®, life coach, educator, and author. She maintains private practices and is co-founder of the Healing Path Center with offices in New York City and Huntington, L.I., New York, as well as an extensive phone practice.

As a licensed psychotherapist, Dr. Howard brings together 24 years of experience, extensive training and expertise in mind-body psychology, meditation, and a variety of the healing arts. Dr. Howard has been frequently seen as an expert and featured guest, on national television shows including, The Maury Povich Show, Turning Point, America’s Talking, Rolanda, Charles Perez and others. Before becoming a psychotherapist, Howard was a professional actress and dancer. She is also the author of "Changes That Last", publication date to be announced.

For more information on Dr Howard, or to reach her directly, go to her SITE

The "Sacred Memory" of Styrofoam Peanuts

--Feature: "Sustainable Soul w/Rebecca Hecking"--

They were chasing me! At least, it felt that way. I was in the parking lot of the supermarket when I found myself pursued by Styrofoam peanuts, those little bits of obnoxious fluff used for packing breakables. Apparently someone at the far end of the lot had dropped a box full of them, and they had been caught up by the wind. Thousands were skittering across the asphalt, spreading out as they moved but flowing in the same general direction, a flock of plastic birds fleeing some unknown predator.

I was annoyed. How careless! Doubtless, most of these would end up being scattered for miles, lodging in trees or floating downstream from a storm drain and eventually ending up in that great tragic island of floating garbage in the ocean. I stooped down and picked up as many as I could, stuffing them in my pockets and grabbing more. I couldn’t possibly get them all. My writer’s mind immediately jumped to metaphors about environmental damage, or the stress of being hounded by too many demands. Both comparisons are valid. Humanity is caught up in a situation not unlike mine in that parking lot. We find ourselves beset by a thousand problems. We may manage to solve some, but many are simply beyond our reach and out of our control. Snapping myself back into the present, I emptied my pockets into a trash can, and bought my groceries.

A few days later, I reached into my jacket pocket and found a stray peanut, a leftover from the parking lot. As I held it in my hand ready to toss it out…

My inner scientist (a product of my college years) started playing mental free-association games. Styrofoam…plastic…polymers…petroleum…fossil fuels…fossil fern fronds… It hit me that this little white blob was really a tiny piece of an ancient legacy, transformed by humans into its present form. What was it before, I wondered. It used to be a living thing, a being that existed on the earth just as I do today. I was struck by a profound sense of kinship across the expanse of Deep Time. We really are all one. Perhaps humanity’s fundamental problem is that we have forgotten that truth.

I find it surprisingly comforting to meditate on what geologists have termed Deep Time, to situate myself as an atom in the grain of sand that is humanity on the vast beach that is life on earth. Perspective like that quickly puts an end to inflated egos and petty problems. On a small shelf next to my computer sits a flat rock with a few fossil shells embedded in it. One of my children found it near our home. It serves as a reminder of all those beings that lived and died eons before anything remotely resembling a human stepped down from the trees of Africa. But the Styrofoam peanut? It’s trash. A problem. An environmental nightmare. Well, yes… it is all of those things. But it’s something else as well.

It is a carrier of the hidden Sacred, a reminder of our connection to our Deep Time ancestors. If we open our eyes, it can serve as a catalyst to our collective memory. Can we find other connections? Can we see the Sacred, hiding in plain sight? Can we use our “thousand problems” to help us remember what we human animals have forgotten? Cultivating a sustainable soul, able to face whatever humanity’s future holds with inner strength and wisdom, requires us to see through our “thousand problems” and find the Sacred in the ordinary stuff of our lives. We must learn to remember.

Rebecca Hecking began her professional life fresh from college as an industrial chemist (complete with white lab coat and flasks of toxic goo). Since then Rebecca has earned her MA in cultural studies and equity studies as has developed a career as a noted writer on the environment, and her philosophy of "deep green" spirituality. Her science background remains a constant presence as the foundation of her writing and world view. Today, she rides wild tangents of thought and searches out deep connections in obscure places, including styrofoam peanuts.

The Climate Crises Through the Eyes of Our Children

--Feature: "Greener Days w/Sara Gordon"--

I am sometimes asked what it takes to build an intuitive relationship to the planet in our kids. In answer, I say that a rapport with the world around us, with nature, an intuitive understanding of the interconnectedness of everything is something all of us are born with; it is innate. The goal for parents then is to foster it, to keep this sense of oneness, wholeness, alive in our children. The challenge is not to teach our kids how to be environmentally aware, but rather to avoid teaching them not to be. Honor their inborn wisdom, and speak truthfully to them about the challenges that confront our species, our planet, our future.

“It’s a very exciting time to be a young person. You live at a thrilling moment in history; a time when, because we must, we will transform our species’ relationship to our environment. We are changing the way we think about and use our natural resources, because our beautiful, ailing planet is telling us we must do this, now, right away. So we will; we already are. And it is you, your generation, who are the ones to push, pull, drag and carry humankind into a thoroughly new way of relating to our Earth. Planet Earth; our only home.

You are learning hard lessons from the mistakes and wrong choices of your parents’ and grandparents’ generations, and with this hard-won knowledge you can build a life-sustaining civilization; a future for you and your children that is cleaner, quieter, safer and saner. We have all been trained, well-trained, to be wasteful, to consume far more than we need. It doesn’t have to be this way.”

This is how I begin the presentations I give to schoolchildren on the subject of climate change. I am among the 1,000 speakers trained in Nashville in January 2007 by Al Gore and the faculty of The Climate Project to adapt and present the slide show on which the film ‘An Inconvenient Truth’ was based. I’ve presented the program 27 times since then; a great majority of the audiences have been young people, from fourth graders to college students. I alert these young people that during the program we will journey together through waste and destruction, doom and despair, and I promise them that we will come to hope, optimism, inspiration, ingenuity and determination. I tell them that our species has a fierce will to live, that our survival mechanisms are embedded in our DNA and are fabulously strong, that we humans will find ways out of the mess we have gotten our species and our planet into.

I do not talk down to them. Kids are not stupid. Kids are under-respected, under-estimated, under-utilized; and they are the future. These kids know their world is in trouble, and they don’t want to be encouraged not to think about it. They want to get busy, get down to the do-or-die business of addressing the crises facing their Earth; they want to shake from their shoulders the yoke of their elders’ inefficient, wasteful consumerist ways that threaten our planet’s air, waters, soils, flora and fauna.

We were taught in Nashville to help listeners avoid leaping from denial to despair without stopping to do something about it. That turns out to be much more of a challenge with adult audiences than with the young. Kids just want to know what they can do to fix the problems. The kids I’ve told the climate change story to have immediately taken action to start recycling programs in their schools, to insist their parents switch to efficient light bulbs, even to ask the local Mayor if he thinks our Village is doing enough to protect the environment.

Knowledge is power. I encourage us all to honor our fears, acknowledge lurking despair, and then set that aside while we tell it like it is to our children. Kids are tough, resilient, incredibly wise, smart and creative. They will surprise us. They will keep us honest, and remind us to do the small things each day that make a difference. They are not afraid. They are determined. We do ourselves and our planet and our young a colossal disservice if we let our own fears get in the way of clear thinking, if we think that protecting them from harsh realities is doing them or any of us a favor.

An accepted pedagogical benchmark recommends “No tragedies before fourth grade.” That sounds about right to me. For the younger kids, simply modeling mindful practices without getting too far into the implications is a good way to go. But as soon as they begin to ask questions, about drowning polar bears, or too-warm winters, take a deep breath and tell them what we’re up against, and where we need to go from here. Tell them all the things you’ve done and are trying to do in your home, your workplace, your community and with your dollars and your vote. Keep them empowered, let them grow up knowing they can change the world with the countless daily actions and choices that are well within their power.

Enlightened choice in the marketplace is how markets will be redirected toward greener, sustainable production. As we adults now begin to question the push to consume that is the cornerstone of our industrial growth society, we can talk with our children about being conscious consumers. Grow a next generation that assumes the need for efficiency and smart use of resources.

And as parents, remember simple strategies to help our youngest global citizens stay attuned to the whole of the planet. Take them out into nature. Look closely with them at the infinite variety of life that surrounds us. Listen to their joy and wonder. Let them teach us to see and appreciate and take better care of our beautiful, fragile world.



Sara Gordon is the founder of Greener Days, a green coaching and buying service assisting businesses and homeowners with reduction of ecological footprints. Sara is a LEED® Accredited Professional through the U.S. Green Building Council's Leadership in Energy & Environmental Design program. She is also one of 1,000 North American Climate Ambassadors of The Climate Project and trained with Al Gore, in a team of educators and scientists, to educate citizens on environmentalism. For more information on Greener Days go to www.greenerdays.net

The Stylish Eco-Friendly Bathroom Made Easy: The Waterfall Solution

--Feature: "Conscious Chic w/Laura Dichtl"--

Award winning Canadian based designer recognized the markets need for colorful, contemporary and classic bathroom furniture made with refined craftsmanship and respect for the environment.

Waterfalls mission was to create bathroom furniture that promotes a cleaner environment that comes along with a wide range of colors, styles and sizes to readily fit into any existing bathroom. Thus resulting in space savvy and stylish vanity collection that is so very Eco-fabulous. The end product leaves consumers energized to renovate consciously with confidence.

Waterfall vanity line has produced beautiful, classic and modern designs that are awe inspiring. Each piece is ready to fit into any style and scale of environment, offering high design possibilities regardless of space. They come in many colors, which offers the ultimate in customization, and can be viewed with the touch of a button by visiting their online site. The styles range from modern, art deco, retro to global to French country, transitional and mid century.

All vanities are crafted from highest-rated FSC-certified formaldehyde-free medium density fiberboard (MDF), the lowest –VOC water based paints available and Caesarstone counter tops, which is a green product. One can also opt for the fully recycled material which is made from milk and detergent packaging. They are manufactured in Canada using Fair trade practices.

Waterfall is in constant search for the latest Eco-friendly materials available so rest assured they will continue to provide us with the most up to date environmentally sensitive bathroom furnishings available.

Gorgeous Eco-friendly bathroom vanities are no longer just an illusion. Explore a better alternative to the ordinary vanity with Waterfall, at www.waterfallbath.com



Conscious Chic is written by contributing writer Laura Dichtl, President of La Peruse Interiors. Laura is a respected interior designer with over fifteen years experience working with high end residential and business clients in the East End (Hamptons), North Shore Long Island and New York City.

Laura's inspired environments have earned her a reputation as a design and life-style expert. Her work has been featured in numerous magazines including Hamptons and HOME Magazine's. Conscious Chic by Laura Dichtl covers the best in "style" for the conscious consumers.

Strategies for the "Herdball Activist" and Beyond

--Feature: "Sustainable Soul w/Rebecca Hecking"--

All right, last week we wrote about the nature of "herball activism," and maybe if had the chance to read it, you've also taken moments in the week to think about it. What is YOUR cause? What issue tugs on your heartstrings, or gets you so mad that steam comes out your ears? Like the monks who are singularly focused on the plight of Tibet, working for only one or two causes can help us avoid that pulled in a hundred directions feeling that can so easily overtake us in a world of overwhelming need. To use the soccer metaphor again, it is as though we are playing a position instead of trying to control the entire field. It's far less exhausting!

The bottom line here is really a question of maintaining healthy boundaries. Yes, we have a responsibility to do something to make the world a better place, but each of us alone cannot shoulder the burden for all the world's problems. If I were to cross Bono with Al Gore, even the resultant über-activist would not be able to right all the world's wrongs. Let's lose the guilt over what we cannot control.

Activism can take many forms. Focusing locally (for example, helping clean up a park or pitching in at a food pantry) has the potential to be a very satisfying experience. The fruits of one's labors may be immediately seen. Widening from local to global, the activist is usually more detached from the results. Donating money, writing letters to Congress, and signing online petitions are all worthwhile, but can lack the personal connection of local work. To add a "heart" dimension to this type of activism, connect it with spiritual practice. For example, visualize or meditate on the positive changes your donation will bring. Light a candle to honor someone touched by your cause, even if you do not know them by name. Say a prayer. Linking spirituality to activism can impart richness and depth to both.

Despite prioritizing, occasionally I play a little activist herdball myself. We all do. And that's ok. The important thing is to recognize it for what it is, to be aware of the media ebb and flow, and not to burn out by spending all our energy on the cause du jour. Again, the key issue is maintaining good boundaries, and being grounded in a healthy sense of perspective. I've found that it's possible to step onto the herdball field in a conscious way without ending up emotionally trampled. Try these:

• Set aside a fixed amount of money in your budget for causes that "pop up". Keep this separate from any money used to support your priority issues.

• Commit to an action such as phoning your Senators, signing petitions or attending vigils. Keep this as "your" response to herd-type causes. Do what you can. Don't stress over what you cannot do.

• Learn to recognize hype when you see it. I've received mailings that have heart-wrenching photos, provocative language and guilt-inducing pleas for money. Upon investigation, I discover that the group is financially irresponsible (or worse, a complete scam).
  

• In the same vein, make a habit of checking out charities, particularly those that are unfamiliar to you. There are several watchdog groups who monitor how charities spend their donations. Try www.give.org or www.charitywatch.org .

In the end, we must keep up our efforts over the long haul, and guard against activist burnout. The world needs all the help it can get. See you out on the field. Will it be herdball or soccer?


Rebecca Hecking is a writer based in northwest PA who focuses on spirituality and sustainable living, as well as managing editor for Primal Parenting. Her "priority" cause is the environment. However, she has been seen yelling at her television set, then furiously typing out feisty letters to Congress.

Healing and Soothing Effects of Herbs and Essential Oils

--Feature: "Life w/Fyfe: Confessions of a Holistic Mom"--

Someone recently asked me about the difference between essential oils and herbs, and it got me thinking about what really appeals to me about aromatherapy. Essential oils are sort of instantaneous and sensual, and I feel a response immediately even if the result I’m looking for takes place over the next few hours or days.

Herbs are food, and for that reason, I love to use them to support health, as well. They feel more gradual to me, and never seem intense, although people who use herbs tell me that they can evoke a powerful response, I’ve only used them in very gradual doses, in teas, like peach leaf and raspberry leaf tea during pregnancy. They taste good, feel supportive and are very helpful. Essential oils can be intense and need to be diluted when using with children, but their power appeals to me, and there is a sensual and physical phenomenon that occurs when I use them that I find very appealing. The scent of an essential oil can fill a room in moments and I find the energy changes immediately. They are at once calming and focusing. They are complex and alive and the fragrance changes the closer it gets to the nose.

For years I used to wear perfume. As a teenage girl I used Love’s Baby Soft, and Gee Your Hair Smells Terrific. Now, when I walk through a mall and I smell the synthetic fragrances, I get a slight headache. And when I smell someone wearing perfume it smells flat to me. The fragrance never changes no matter how long the wearer has it on. That never happens with essential oils. When it is first applied the fragrance is very strong, but it immediately begins evaporating, and changing. If attention is paid to the various notes, the complexity can be compared to the many flavors found in good wine. So, even when we’re all healthy and happy, I simply enjoy the way they smell.



Lisa Fyfe is a contributing columnist for The Lohasian. Her column, “Life with Fyfe: Confessions of a Holistic Mom” delivers a perspective on the everyday life of a modern holistic mom, as well as provides an insider look into best strategies for natural health and healing for the whole family.

Lisa is a Reiki Master, and an expert in Essential Oil Healing, and has spent the last several years extensively researching traditional diet and nutrition, with a focus on “whole,” locally grown and raised natural foods. She is a married mother of two children, Sophie and Max. Lisa approaches mothering as her highest calling, and believes that all mothers are natural healers and enjoys helping mothers (and others) help their children through the use of a variety of natural modalities.

To Reach Lisa, Email Here at lisafyfe (at) verizon.net

Spiritual Nourishment: How to Feed Your Soul in a Busy World

--Feature: "The Conscious Path w/Dr.Jennifer Howard"--

We are all bombarded by the outside world with endless numbers of things vying for our attention and our time. There are so many distractions. Many of us go from place to place trying to figure out how to get everything we want and need done.

From hundreds of television channels, endless Web sites and endless interesting blogs to the every day life duties on our “to do,” “to know” and “to see” list, it never feels done. And besides, if we are being conscious, we have our physical body demands with preparing good food and getting our daily exercise. We also must attend to our jobs, our house, our children, and our relationships. Then there are all the cultural requirements of keeping up with what is deemed important.

With all these different agendas, how do we fit it all in? We become more conscious of how we spend our time. We know from the deepest reaches, time is endless. We also know from our day-to-day living, time can seem to evaporate. Most of us can say we are not sure where time goes. Sometimes we are not spending it as wisely as we could. In our ordinary consciousness, there are 24 hours in a day. How do we choose to spend our precious time?

By becoming more aware of our choices around time, we can empower ourselves. We can choose to feed the deeper part of ourselves. Feeding our soul can become part of our daily agenda. We can make more conscious choices. Take a moment to tune in and ask what is truly needed. What does this deeper self need for personal growth and spiritual growth in order to integrate our physical, emotional, mental and spiritual selves? Sometimes it only takes a minute to tune in and give ourselves soul food. We could choose to read some inspirational material while we are on the exercise bike, listen to helpful tapes while we cook, take five minutes a day to journal and ten minutes a day to start a meditation practice. What stops us from our soul’s longing? Often it’s the choices we make about what appears to us as life demands and distractions that catch us.

Let’s allow ourselves to be more mindful of how we are consumed by all that life throws at us. We can ask ourselves:

• How are we distracted?

• What choices are we making around time?

• How can we make choices that come into greater alignment with our life’s purpose?

Our true-selves are calling us. It’s up to us to turn away from all of life’s distractions and just take a moment of time to listen.


Jennifer Howard, Ph.D. is an internationally known psychotherapist, Integrated Kabbalistic Healer®, life coach, educator, and author. She maintains private practices and is co-founder of the Healing Path Center with offices in New York City and Huntington, L.I., New York, as well as an extensive phone practice.

As a licensed psychotherapist, Dr. Howard brings together 24 years of experience, extensive training and expertise in mind-body psychology, meditation, and a variety of the healing arts. Dr. Howard has been frequently seen as an expert and featured guest, on national television shows including, The Maury Povich Show, Turning Point, America’s Talking, Rolanda, Charles Perez and others. Before becoming a psychotherapist, Howard was a professional actress and dancer. Her book "Changes That Last", publication date to be announced.

For more information on Dr Howard, or to reach her directly, go to her SITE

Lifestyle as the Fountain of Youth: Insights on Slowing the Aging Process

--Feature: "Heart of Healing w/Christopher Fischer, ND"--

At least once a day, a patient or two or three ask, “What is the newest best thing to slow the aging process?” The short answer is….Live a healthy life…

So what does it mean to live a healthy life? There are no magic supplements for those of us without disease who want to remain young and vibrant. So what do we do? How do we prevent the deterioration we associate with old age?

Prevention:

• Get regular testing: Blood chemistry, Electrolytes, Mineral levels, Hormone levels, GI profile, Prostate, Cancer Markers, and Stress Test. The sooner you find something, the sooner you can prevent any damages.

• Overhaul the diet. Frequent small portions, balance of the food groups. Organic whenever possible.

• Live a healthy lifestyle. Don’t sit in front of the TV all day. Exercise regularly and add healthy activities like hiking, biking, walking, and swimming etc.

• Supplement only what you need. A good quality multi-vitamin with extra anti-oxidants, Digestive enzymes, and Probiotics.

• Detox, Detox, Detox. Perhaps most important in our toxic world. Respiratory, Digestive, Urinary, and Skin, all need a tune up with each change of season. Herbal Medicines, Hydrotherapy, Fresh Juicing, all help these eliminatory organs protect the body from cell breakdown.

So when the next best thing promises the fountain of youth. Don’t believe it. Youth is not as much a product of age as it is a product of lifestyle. Our bodies carry the sum total of how well or poorly we care for them. So don’t wait for some futuristic miracle that may never come, start now. Create healthy habits now, test regularly, detoxify seasonally, and live a youth-full life no matter what your age.


Christopher Fischer is a Naturopathic Physician and is the President of Natural Health Specialist in East Northport New York. He received his Doctorate in Naturopathic Medicine from Bastyr University.

He frequently lectures on Naturopathic Medicine and natural healing, and has been a contributing expert for American Spa Magazine, Creations Magazine, The Northport Observer as well as the Natural Health Show on METRO TV (NY). He is the proud father of two boys and resides in East Northport New York.

For more information see Christopher Fischer's site at www.webndny.com

Herdball Activism:Charity in a Pack Mentality World

--Feature: "Sustainable Soul w/Rebecca Hecking"--

Five year olds do not play soccer. They play “herdball”, as it is jokingly referred to by my teenage son who referees their games. Instead of spreading out on the field and playing a position (such as midfielder or forward), they bunch up in a herd and chase the ball back and forth on the field. “Team” has little meaning except for the matching t-shirts.

From where I sit watching the big wide world go by, it seems to me that adults play a sort of media-directed herdball of our own. Remember any of these?

• All those red ribbons for AIDs awareness worn by celebrities at the Oscars

• RAWA : the organization of Afghani women who resist the Taliban

• The tsunami that washed away entire villages in Indonesia

Each of these was and is important, but I haven’t heard much about them lately, and I suspect you haven’t either. I detect a pattern. Some event or issue triggers a flurry of media attention, followed by another flurry of activism, donations, demonstrations, and letter writing. Then, time passes, public interest wanes and the media goes on to the next issue or event, followed of course by the next flurry of activity. The issue “ball” gets chased by the well-meaning herd until it goes “out of bounds” (off the media radar). A new ball is tossed into play, and the game continues until the players quit from exhaustion.

I have spoken with weary, burnt-out people who are tired of playing this game which appears to accomplish nothing. They have become cynical, and feel torn in a hundred directions for a hundred worthy causes. The sheer magnitude of the world’s many problems feels overwhelming to them, and constant appeals for action or donations only make matters worse.

At the moment, one of the “balls in play” is the politics of Tibet. We have seen activist monks protesting and suffering for their cause. These monks are most decidedly NOT part of the activist herd. Their entire lives have been given in service of preserving Tibetan culture and religious faith. They are deeply grounded in their cause, linked by both physical geography and spiritual practice. Although they too may feel fatigued at times, they aren’t going to take up another issue anytime soon. They are playing for keeps. The herd may chant “Free Tibet” at the Olympic games this summer, but the monks will continue working long after the media hoopla has faded.

I’ve said in previous columns that a sustainable soul is dynamic, grounded and self-renewing . If you’ve been engaged in nothing but herdball activism and are feeling burnt out from it, maybe it’s time for a change. Instead of running with the herd, take some time and really examine which issues touch your heart. Think for a moment. What is THE most important issue to YOU? The environment? Human rights? Cancer research? It doesn’t matter that there are a thousand other equally important issues out there. For now, simply figure out what resonates with you on a deep level. Next week, we’ll explore ways to work for your cause without burning out, as well as think about how to consciously “run with the herd” if we choose.


Rebecca Hecking is a writer based in northwest PA who focuses on spirituality and ecology, as well as managing editor for Primal Parenting. She has watched many games of herdball over the years, and has loved every minute of it.

Thoreau, Gandhi and Buddha...Environmentalist Ideals Before it Got Trendy

--Feature: "Greener Days w/ Geoffrey Paul Gordon"--

Henry David Thoreau wrote the great green self-help guide, Walden; or, Life in the Woods, published in 1848. The essays are a catalogue of the sustainable lifestyle and an ode to an austere but rich coexistence with Nature. He advised on economy, nature, morality, solitude and living the good life against the tide of modernization. He was by many measures an extremist of the pioneering sort, even for the middle of the nineteenth century. He didn’t stray from the path that led from his cottage dwelling to the nearby water lest he leave a footprint larger than was necessary.

Thoreau owned very few things and managed his humble means with a Spartan frugality. He hated as gossip what most people called news and the blowing of the distant railroad whistle interrupted his reveries and sounded to his Romantic ear like the harbinger of more and louder intrusions to come. Boy, was he was right. Thoreau’s Walden Pond experiment lasted two years and two months. He dropped off the ‘grid’ of his day, then came back with a renewed sense of hope that humanity could find its way towards a new, more humane and natural style of living within the environment while affecting it as little as possible. Through his essays, this great naturalist writer left us a map that cannot become outdated.

Most people reading this simply cannot make wholesale radical changes in their lives. Some don’t need to (though they’re likely trying to perfect and disseminate their best eco-friendly practices). And many are in the process of retraining themselves, taking small steps in a common direction towards cleaner, smarter, more forward thinking and better living We cannot move to Walden Pond, but we can bless ourselves with alternatives that curb our current impact. Gandhi’s teachings that prescribed self-sufficient communities extend Thoreau’s ideal to a model for more populous places, but the ethical principles of mutual respect for fellow creatures and common respect for the land unite the eastern and western traditions. Legend has it that Buddha uttered on his deathbed the last of his sage advice: “Keep living diligently.”



Geoffrey Paul Gordon grew up in New York City and attended the Ethical Culture Schools, Columbia University and New York Universities. He is an award-winning playwright and has been teaching in the Arts and Humanities since 1980. Geoffrey is a junior partner in Greener Days (founded by his wife, Sara Gordon), a New York based coaching and consulting firm helping companies and individuals "go green."

Family Matters: Fathering for Luxury and Necessity

--Feature: "Fathering the Family w/Rich Givens"--

As fathers, it isn’t always our first thought to sublimate our desires or alter our way of life to suit our children. We are taught to provide and focus on success defined in ways that aren’t necessarily consistent with our children’s simple needs.

A powerful emotional moment changed my perspective.

My daughter stood at the open door, wailing. Her beautiful eyes were filled with tears, and she reached towards me frantic and hysterical. She was terrified at the thought of us leaving her behind with this stranger. Only one year old, she couldn’t understand our motivations. She just wanted her mommy and daddy. Still, we left our child at the daycare provider’s home and drove away, towards work and responsibility.

People are certainly busy. Fancy houses, twin cars, cable TV, and cell phones all cost money. We exchange our time and our labor for them. This is a lifestyle many of us feel compelled to seek, and I was not immune. My desire to meet my daughter’s needs led me to ask a few questions. What is the difference between a necessity and a luxury? How much is enough? Was the trade I was making a good one?

The answer for me was no. I made a vow to be an advocate for my child. I resolved that I would not be the cause of insecurity or a source of disappointment. Innocence deserves better. Little ones are helpless, subject to forces they can neither understand nor control. They seek security and protection, and we must give it to them. Children have instinctive fears. One of the most primal is a fear of separation from their parents.

As I listened to my daughter cry, my heart stretched and bent. I realized that parents also have instincts. I wanted to be with her as much as she wanted to be with me. I ached to protect her, to calm her